My Counterparts!
by MiscellaneousSoup
Summary: The Cabbage Merchant is forced to go to a meeting that consists of alternate versions of himself. Rated K for slapstick.


**A/N: Yet another idea that I thought of while half-asleep and dazed. A couple of days after the matter, I decided to write it. Also, my first Avatar: The Last Airbender story! WOO! I don't own anything. Read and review, if you please. Have an excellent day!**

**My Counterparts!**

by MiscellaneousSoup

_Once upon a time, a cosmic figure grew bored. He decided to spy on various universes for his own amusement. After finding the _Avatar_ universe, he grew intrigued with one particular resident: The cabbage merchant. He decided to use his magic powers to teleport every single alternate version of the cabbage merchants into one meeting, known to all who arrived as MerchantCon. Unfortunately, he forgot to grab the original cabbage merchant for the first meeting. And the second. And the third. And about five more meetings. He's a busy guy, darn it! This is the encounter of the original cabbage merchant's first attendance of MerchantCon…_

Once day, the cabbage merchant strolled throughout his latest hometown, searching for veggie-loving patrons. As long as he didn't encounter any trouble, things would be fine. However, about five blocks into it, he felt something odd, as if gigantic eyes were staring at him through a telescope. Five seconds later, he was plucked out of existence, just as if you would eat a grape.

…_.._

The merchant yelped and looked around. He was in a white haze. Only his cabbage cart, miraculously still full, was with him.

A voice boomed around him. **"Hello, cabbage merchant. I am Zlofrious, a magical being. You have been chosen to go to MerchantCon, a gathering of people precisely like you. Well, exactly like you, if you want to get nitpicky. There are others like you, merchant. Remember your lost dream of selling cantaloupes? One of your counterparts does. They hawk their wares, as you do. They get knocked over and damaged, as you do. They travel from location to location, as you do. However, they sell things that you do not. For example, meatloaf, spaghetti, chairs, tables, pushpins, and almost anything you can comprehend. They look exactly like you. You will meet all of them. I am just giving you this warning so you don't freak out."**

The cabbage merchant shook his head. "No! I need to sell my cabbages! If I don't make money today, I can't buy dinner! I refuse to eat my cabbages. They are my babies." He kissed the nearest cabbage, grimacing at the taste of mold and dirt.

Zlofrious laughed, causing the area to shake. "Do not worry. I will send you back to your realm with no time passing during your visit, give or take a second. Now, let us begin!"

Before the merchant could make any further complaints, he was teleported away.

_MerchantCon 2014…_

Merchants were everywhere. They could be found selling items, haggling over buying items, haggling over selling items, searching for new merchandise, eating food, laughing, talking, and, especially, tripping over each other. You see, despite the Gaang accidentally coming across the cabbage guy and his counterparts, not many people know that all versions of him are notoriously clumsy. All across the room, you could hear the poor people stumbling across each other and crying out in soulful agony.

"My fruitcakes!"

"My antiques!"

"My challah!"

"My grandma!"

"My babies!"

"My watermelons!"

"My poisonous bugs!"

"My water buffalo drawings!"

"My...I don't feel so good….Did something just crawl…"

The cabbage merchant gaped in astonishment. There were so many people. How is it possible that they all looked and sounded like him? This had to be some kind of hallucination from last night's chowder. Was he dying?

The voice interrupted his increasingly paranoid thoughts. **"Hello, everyone. You have had time to meet and greet. For once, I remembered to bring Cabbage Prime, but I did so at too late of a time. The party is over. There is only one more thing. I love slapstick. I am going to use my omnipotent powers to make all of you fall over! MWUAHAHHAHAHA!"**

And so, Zlofrious, the evil manipulator, caused all of them to trip and fall for pure amusement. After about seven hours of this, the bruised and battered merchants were sent back to their own realms. Next year, the horror would begin anew. So, please, after hearing this, won't you donate to my campaign? Go to Patreon and look up "Avatar; Demons; Donkey spittle." You will find a page. For every twenty-five dollars donated, I will evaporate one-fifth of Zlofrious. Pledge me your soul and he will be destroyed forever. No particular reason for wanting your soul. I'm not a demon! Or am I?

_This has been a message from Suoirfolz, an entity of eternal horror and despair._

**THE END**


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